Thursday, September 6, 2007

Lost in Translation

I couldn't resist re-posting a bulletin a friend posted on MySpace today. I especially love number 4. Gentlemen, take notes!

1. FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. FIVE MINUTES: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. NOTHING: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4. GO AHEAD: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5. LOUD SIGH: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. THAT''S OK: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. THANKS: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.

8. WHATEVER: Is a women's way of saying F@!K YOU!

9. DON''T WORRY ABOUT IT, I GOT IT: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to #3.


srios24 said...

So true!!! It is amazing that we women can communicate so much in so few words!! Love it!

Anonymous said...

I could have wrote that for the last 57 years!


pseudored2 said...

Can you send this to Jeff? Actually he is pretty good with this list, but sometimes.....

Swanny said...

Standard guy response, as suggest by Chick Mcgee from the Bob&Tom Show: "Oh really? ...Okay."

The Mrs. said...

I've read this before, and am always amazed at how true it is. My favorites (and frequently used) are #3 & #9. The last one is bound to get thrown around often now that football season is back in full swing. I'm sure The General would agree!